Archive for July, 2008
Emotion: Winning People’s Hearts
Author: admin
Whereas logic is the language of the conscious mind, emotion is the language of the unconscious mind. We know that emotions are reactions to perceived and imagined stimuli, not based on logic, but on one’s own personal experiences. Emotions often outweigh our logic. Imagine placing a plank of wood on the ground and walking its length a few times. Easy enough, right? But suppose you placed it a hundred feet in the air between two buildings. You know you can walk that plank—you just did it over and over again. Yet now, emotions and fears outweigh logic. Your ‘‘what-ifs’’ and your imagination supersede the concrete knowledge of your ability to walk the plank.
In his book Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman asserts that understanding emotions is more pertinent to leading a successful life than having a high intelligence. Often people of high IQ struggle at work because of their weaknesses in fundamental human relation skills. Goleman calls this skill ‘‘emotional intelligence.’’ He emphasizes that emotional intelligence largely determines our success in relationships, work, and even physical wellness. Emotional intelligence ‘‘is a type of social intelligence that involves the ability to monitor one’s own and others’ emotions, to discriminate among them, and to use the information to guide one’s thinking and actions.’’[7 ]Emotional intelligence includes emotional management, personal motivation, empathy, self-awareness, and social skills.
When you are persuading someone, emotions provide the springboard for a successful execution of your argument. In fact, I would even say emotions are the energy and very fuel of the persuasion process. Without tapping into your audience’s emotions, there is no strength or energy in your message. Emotion is a power you can harness and use in practically every aspect of persuasion. Remember, logic is important, but emotion helps you catapult an otherwise dull or flat exchange to the next level.
Consider the following advantages of emotion over logic:
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Arousing the emotions of your audience engages your listeners and distracts them from your intention to influence and persuade.
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Emotion requires less effort than logic. Logic solicits cognitive effort, whereas emotion is automatic.
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Presentations aimed at engaging the audience’s emotions are usually more interesting than logical ones.
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Emotion-based arguments are often easier to recall than logic-based arguments.
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Emotion almost always leads more quickly to change than logic does.[8]
You must know when to create positive or negative emotions and when to dispel negative emotions. You have to find ways to tap into your prospects’ emotions, such as hope, love, pride, gratitude, and excitement. If you can do this, you can inspire anyone. Decide ahead of time what emotional climate you want to create, capture those emotions within yourself, and you’ll be surprised how you can transfer those emotions to your audience.
[7 ]P. Salovey and J. D. Mayer, ‘‘Emotional Intelligence: Imagination, Cognition, and Personality,’’ reprinted in Human Emotions, J. M. Jenkins, K. Oatley, and N. L. Stein, editors (Oxford: Blackwell Publishers, 1998), pp. 313–319.
[8]Tellis, Advertising and Sales Promotion Strategy, pp. 160–161.
taken from; Maximum Influence–The 12 Universal Laws of Power Persuasion
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Author: admin
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Monitoring Mindset: The Mental Game of Persuasion
Author: admin
Beliefs
Understanding your audience’s beliefs will help you know what approach to take. Beliefs are those things we accept as truth, consciously or subconsciously, proven or unproven. Beliefs come from our environment, our culture, our education, our experience, or even through osmosis from our friends and family. One of the most common sources of our beliefs comes from being a part of a group, such as a family or a type of tight-knit community. People often take on the beliefs and rules of the groups to which they belong and then behave in accordance with those beliefs and rules.
Values
A value is more ingrained than a belief because it is more deeply and consciously committed to. A value is typically something that has been very thoroughly contemplated and accepted. It is for this reason that values are much harder to change than beliefs. Usually, a true value will not be changed, not even by wealth, acceptance, or pressure. Be sure when you are in a persuasive situation that your audience doesn’t feel like you’re trying to attack their values. This will only make them feel defensive toward you. As Walt Disney wisely stated, ‘‘When values are clear, decisions are easy.’’
Indifference
People who are indifferent most likely have never even thought about the issue, or they have had no reason to care about it. Indifferent people come across as greatly apathetic because the topic you are presenting is something they’ve never had to cognitively process before. People who are indifferent don’t want to be bothered. These people usually don’t care about you or your message. Often they’re only there because they have to be, or their indifference is just a general lack of interest or boredom in general. An indifferent audience needs attention, empathy, and a reason to care.
taken from; Maximum Influence–The 12 Universal Laws of Power Persuasion
The Theory of Cognitive Dissonance
Author: admin
Leon Festinger formulated the cognitive dissonance theory in 1957 at Stanford University. He asserted, ‘‘When attitudes conflict with actions, attitudes or beliefs, we are uncomfortable and motivated to try to change.’’ Festinger’s theory sets the foundation for the Law of Dissonance, one of the twelve laws of Maximum Influence.
The Law of Dissonance states that people will naturally act in a manner that is consistent with their cognitions (beliefs, attitudes, and values). Therefore, when people behave in a manner that is inconsistent with these cognitions, they find themselves in a state of discomfort. In such an uncomfortable state, they will naturally be inclined to adjust their behaviors or attitudes to regain mental and emotional consistency. When our beliefs, attitudes, and actions mesh, we live harmoniously. When they don’t, we feel dissonance at some level—that is, we feel awkward, uncomfortable, unsettled, disturbed, upset, nervous, or confused. In order to eliminate or reduce such tension, we will do everything possible to change our attitudes and behavior, even if it means doing something we don’t want to do.
Imagine that there is a big rubber band inside you. When dissonance is present, the rubber band begins to stretch. As long as the dissonance exists, the band stretches tighter and tighter. You’ve got to take action before it reaches a breaking point and snaps. The motivation to reduce the tension is what causes us to change; we will do everything in our power to get back in balance. We seek psycho-emotional stasis at all times, much like we experience the ever-present, driving need for food and water to satisfy our physical being.
taken from; Maximum Influence–The 12 Universal Laws of Power Persuasion
Life is change; persuasion is change. As a Master Persuader, you must be able to create and motivate change. Understanding human nature is knowing that most people will resist change and burrow into their comfort zones. We tend to follow the path of least resistance. However, change is the only thing that can lift us up from where we currently lie. Oliver Wendell Holmes said, ‘‘Man’s mind, stretched to a new idea, never goes back to its original dimensions.’’ We all want to become a better person and to be ‘‘stretched’’ to accomplish more things, but we are stuck in our daily patterns.
As you go through the Pre-Persuasion Checklist, find out how resistant to change your audience is likely to be. Will persuading them be like breaking through a brick wall or a cardboard box? Are they ready to make changes because of their circumstances and surroundings? Are they already trying to change? Some of your prospects will oppose you and blatantly resist your persuasive message. This is great news—this means they are listening and it’s a sign of involvement. If the audience gives no feedback, then they are not involved in your message.
There are three ways people make changes in their life. One is through drastic change. This could be a heart attack, a personal tragedy, or losing a job. These events force people to change their lives. They did not feel a need to change until threatening, life-changing events occurred. The second is through gradual change. This is a process that evolves from events or personal relationships. Gradual change happens over time, so much so that you usually don’t notice that it is happening. The third way people change their lives is through internal change. This can come from inspiration or desperation, but either way, you have consciously decided you are going to make changes in your life.
To get change to stick, you must make sure three things occur, whether within yourself or your audience. First, there must be a long-term, enthusiastic commitment to change. You have to decide there is no other option. The second thing is that you must be willing to pay the price, persisting even when you feel weak. Third, you have to know where the change is taking them. How is this going to affect their lives? What are the end results?
The biggest obstacles to change are lack of motivation, lack of knowledge, and fear. People will not change if they don’t know where that change is taking them. We naturally watch out for our own future and want to prevent harm from reaching us. As a persuader, you need to create a vision for your audience, one that shows them what they will be like in the future. If you can get people to see themselves in the future and witness where that change will take them, they will be more willing to embrace change. Understand that people will resist change unless sufficient reinforcement and tools are provided to assist them. Without having this knowledge, their attitudes won’t change, and if their attitudes won’t change, then their actions won’t change.
taken from; Maximum Influence–The 12 Universal Laws of Power Persuasion
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On Getting Serious about CEO Succession
Author: admin
Nowadays, succession planning has become a front-burner issue in corporate boardrooms across the country. If you want to find the expert on how to recruit corporate directors and CEO, you would need to know Dennis Carey. Dennis Carey is the Senior Client Partner of Korn Ferry International since October 2007. Dennis serves as a director of The Edgewater Funds, AirClic, and both co-founded and directing Wharton’s Director’s Institute.
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The Persuasion Pitfall
Author: admin
Understand your audience and what laws of persuasion you are going to use on them. There are times and situations where certain persuasive laws or techniques are not appropriate. You cannot treat every person or every audience the same way. If you take persuasion too far, you will run into what I call the Persuasion Pitfall.
People are persuaded and influenced until they feel cheated, misled, or taken advantage of, and then they never tell you about their feelings or do business with you again.
In sales and marketing, we have a tendency push the envelope a little too hard when trying to persuade others. This could be in a personal one-on-one encounter with a friend or in a visit to the local furniture store. Persuaders who do not possess the ability to read others or who do not have the skills necessary to persuade typically fall victim to the Persuasion Pitfall. They will take persuasion a little too far, using extreme pressure or trying to sell you a product you don’t need or want. Use persuasion, influence, or power the wrong way and people lose all trust in you, never to be persuaded by you again. When over-persuading, you do or say something that sets off silent alarms in you prospects’ minds. It could be a feeling of uneasiness, or a bad feeling toward you, your store, or your product.
This pitfall also includes selling a faulty product. The challenge with this pitfall is that 99 percent of the people in the world will say nothing to you about the defective item or about your over-persuading. They simply will never go into your store again. They will never want to associate with your product. Or, if you are a friend or member of the family, they will never trust or listen to your point of view again. This pitfall is a silent killer because most persuaders don’t even realize the mistake was ever made. The duped person will never come back to the store and will probably tell others not to go back too. You have probably had this happen to you many times, at a car dealership, in retail stores, and on the phone. You have to have a sixth sense in persuasion and know how hard you can push.
We hate to feel manipulated or pressured. We have all been burned or taken advantage of, and when we see signs of such behavior we start to run. Many uneducated persuaders can be offensive, condescending, obnoxious, and insulting. Some people will need to have space, some will have to talk to a spouse, and still others will have to come back later before making a decision. You have to sense and know via knowledge and experience and nonverbal cues how many tools of persuasion you can use without running up against this pitfall. You have to sense your limits before you cross the line.
taken from; Maximum Influence–The 12 Universal Laws of Power Persuasion
The more we understand personality directions and personality types, the better we will be able to customize our persuasive presentations. A personality direction is the way we lean most of the time in terms of the way we act and react to most stimuli. We hate to be put in a box and categorized, but the reality is that (most of the time) we are predictable. Sure, people can never be 100 percent predictable, but you will be amazed at how predictable they actually are as you become a student of human nature.
Each personality direction will dictate how you customize your message. When you analyze personality directions, ask yourself the following questions:
A. Are your audience or prospects mostly logical or emotional?
Logical
Use their heads
Go with what makes sense
Are persuaded by facts, figures, and statistics Rely on past history
Use their five senses
Emotional
Use their heart
Go with what feels right
Are persuaded by emotions
Rely on intuition
Use their ‘‘sixth sense’’
B. Are your audience or prospects introverted or extroverted?
Extroverts
Love to communicate
Are talkative
Involve others
Tend to be public people
Want face-to-face contact
Introverts
Keep feelings inside
Listen more than they talk
Like to work solo
Tend to be private
Use memos and e-mails
C. Are your audience or prospects motivated more by inspiration or desperation?
Desperation
Try to get away from the problem
Are stuck in the past, don’t want to repeat prior mistakes Avoid pain
Want to get away from something
Inspiration
Work towards a solution
See a better future
Are motivated by pleasure
Want to move forward (have a vision)
D. Are your audience or prospects assertive or amiable?
Assertive
Consider results more important than relationships
Make decisions quickly
Want to be in control
Are task-oriented
Don’t waste time
Are independent
Amiable
Consider relationships more important than results
Are friendly and loyal
Like to build relationships
Are great listeners
Avoid contention
Are nonassertive and agreeable
It is important to note that, when it comes to persuasion, personality directions most like our own personality type create a feeling of comfort and safety for us. Styles that differ from our own create tension and defensiveness. Master Persuaders can match all personality directions.
taken from; Maximum Influence–The 12 Universal Laws of Power Persuasion